Category Archives: Route 53 – Life is A Highway

Just ramblings about my everyday life. I often wonder if other people think these things too. Some day my children can read these thoughts and maybe the will say, “Hmm, so that is what dad was really thinking” or, “At least I would know what dad would do if he were in my situation”

Paving the Golden (Gate) Road in Life

08 Sunday Feb 2009

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To know the road ahead, ask those coming back – Chinese proverb
Crossing the Golden Gate
Crossing the Golden Gate

This weekend I was driving across the Golden Gate Bridge  early in the morning and listening to John Legend’s “This Time”.  It was a crisp morning and we were on our way to our son’s basketball game.  It was a family moment with our two children in the back seat, but as my wife turned up the volume and sang along, it became her moment and we all listened.  It is hard to explain the feeling when you listen to someone is appreciating what they have and is inspired by their own journey.  My wife never has been one to turn up the volume, but the song and the beauty of the morning sun gleaming off one of our country’s iconic monuments probably hit her.  I quickly captured the moment with my camera phone.

During the game I pulled out  a copy of  “This Time’s A Charm”, a book that I’m reading by Don Wilhelm, 4 time cancer survivor.  I’ll be part of his Book Blog tour which I will be part of during the beginning of March.  Don shows the power of positive thinking.  He does not claim it will heal all people, but I personally believe it affects those around you to see such a strong attitude when things are at their lowest.  I will write more about the book in the future, but I sat next to one of the other dads on the team.  He has lymphoma and has been suffering for three years and I know it has taken a toll on his family and his life.  I’ve asked myself if I should offer the book to him to read, but it is not my place. 

Back to my wife we took the weekend in stride and went after life.  We fixed things in the house like the broken lighting in our bathroom.  We also arranged our next vacation, played with our kids and let them help decide where we should go next.  We want to expand their life experiences while they are  young and innocent.  Our lives are touched and we are grateful for all that we have.  Despite my wife’s positive prognosis and people telling her how inspired they are by how she has responded, she has (and so do I) felt that her battle is nothing compared to what others have been through or are going through.    This weekend my wife heard from an online friend who has the same physicians and it always reminds her that she is one of many and that her struggle is still ongoing.  At the same time we heard from my wife’s brother than he and his wife are having their second child, a girl, this summer.  Along with my inlaw’s 50th wedding anniversary, this is shaping up to be a pretty eventful summer!

Tonight we watched the 60 Minutes special of local hero Chesley Sullenberger, the captain of US Airways flt 1549 that landed safely in the Hudson River with all 155  passengers and crew surviving.  He said in the interview that he didn’t think what he did should be warranting so much praise, but he understands the gratitude and is still learning how his actions can be so lauded even though what happened to him is something he had always wanted to avoid (losing a plane).  It is so amazing that what this guy did was such a success and textbook yet he felt so bad and questioned his actions as to whether he could have done better.  To me that is the parallel.  This man is just trying to make his path, his road down life and yet everyone is looking to him as an inspiration.  It isn’t just the 155 lives he saved that day, but all the people who were inspired by him and all the lives he affected through the relatives of those 155 people who are still alive today.

For me this week the road will continue and I will look forward to hearing and observing new stories that help me navigate this world and help me educate my children as to the importance of living life to the fullest.

 

Affiliate Summit – An Industry that Cares

05 Thursday Feb 2009

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My father used to say, “You can spend a lot of time making money. The tough time comes when you have to give it away properly. How to give something back, that’s the tough part in life.” – Lee Iacocca
With Missy Ward, Co-founder of Affiliate Summit

With Missy Ward, Co-founder of Affiliate Summit

I recently had a chance to attend our industry’s annual meeting in Las Vegas.  There is a summer event as well on the East Coast but I think after the holidays, everyone is ready to talk about what they have experienced in the past year to share their successes and learnings.  I’ve been part of this community of online marketers off and on for the past 10 years and have seen many of its changes.

As the Web changes we are continually reminded of what it takes to succeed and that is why although Affiliate marketing is not the most high profile parts of the industry, it is the part I enjoy most.  Affiliate marketing is no different than the traditional Avon salespeople who used to go door-to door selling beauty products.  It was community marketing at its finest.  Now with the internet, you have the ability to reach more people.  if you can convince others on the Web to consume products based upon your recommendations or input, you could earn money.

On the Web, these affiliates are your salespeople. Who are affiliates? Our Keynote was delivered by Gary Vaynerchuk, host of Wine Library TV and he gave the best definition of affiliates.  He said, “For the most part, affiliates are lazy but the best affiliates are like Rocky, they wake up in the morning eat raw eggs and do push ups on rocks.”  That is what I love about this industry, these are hard working earnest people who are looking for a new way to skin a cat.  In every company I’ve been in, I always get the questions, “What the heck are your affiliates doing? How can they do that?  They can’t do that, can they?” Now with the fragmented Web and people spending more time surfing the Web (accordingly visiting 75% more sites than they did last year).  Truly amazing.

Well despite the quiet wealth accumulated by those in the industry, the industry as a whole is caring and I am proud to be part of this business.  One of the founders of the Affiliate Summit is Missy Ward.  She and her business partner, Shawn Collins, are industry veterans.  They have both been touched by breast cancer and make a concerted to intertwine their conferences with fundraising.  Missy participates in breast cancer walks and at their conferences they have incorporated some fun and games to raise money in the fight against breast cancer.  Check out AMGB.wordpress.com

Thanks to Missy and her partner for not only helping our industry to thrive, but also for making sure all of our hearts are in the right place.

Simple Pleasures of San Francisco

01 Sunday Feb 2009

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“You are fortunate to live here. If I were your President, I would levy a tax on you for living in San Francisco!” – Mikhail Gorbachev

Thank heavens the Russians never took over our City!

After a long week of travel and looking at another week of travel to colder parts of the country I am so glad to live in the city Herb Caen affectionately called “Baghdad by the Bay”.  Living in San Francisco you don’t even need to go hog wild to enjoy its simple pleasures.  I was already exhausted but wanted to enjoy the decent January weather and spend some time with my two children and wife.  If you didn’t know I am a proud San Franciscan.  I’ve had a chance to live in other great American cities such as New York and Chicago but San Francisco has all that I need.  It’s small, diverse, community oriented,and yet very sophisticated and progressive.  As a father, all you could ever want is to give your kids the best that you know how and sometimes when I  need help, this city offers up a beautiful weekend.

With moderate temperatures and ample parking it is easy to get around.  I just wanted to recharge my batteries on Saturday watching my kid’s basketball games (and teaching my kids a few moves on the courts), hitting a few golf balls at the Presidio Golf Course (the oldest course west of the Mississippi). I also got to go to my favorite hideaway in San Francisco, Liguria Bakery.  Open since 1910, it is a family run business that makes the best focaccia around.  It is all they make and all the major restaurants buy their focaccia from them.  It is a San Francisco secret.  Why?  Well they start baking at about 5am every morning and open their doors around 7am and close when they’ve sold out.  That could be 10am or 3pm.  Oh, and they go back to Italy every year for the summer for about 6 weeks.   If you’re coming here, just ask a local.  there is a small sign in the window, but nobody will give away the secret.

Inside, things look much like they always have except for the few autographed photos from some recent baseball players on the Giants. A rather sparse counter with a roll of paper for wrapping and and a sign that lists the focaccia for sale is all you will find.  I remember when the standard for the cocaccia was $1.50

 
Prices have gone up in recent years but I once lived on a diet of their focaccia when I was on a budget back in college.  Get the plain pizza focaccia with tomato and green onion.  It’ll serve two adults easily. BEWARE CASH ONLY, but it won’t suck your wallet dry

Afterwards we took the kids to the Haight Ashbury and got our kids some Ben & Jerry’s at our store located conveniently on the famous corner where hippies changed our culture back in the ’60s.  From there we walked over to Golden Gate Park, past the Arboretum and back to our home.  Our kids thought all the “new Hippies”  (homeless) were interesting but as parents we try to teach our children empathy and not to stare.  Most of all we are happy that they are not scared and are exposed to many of our society’s many issues and are not sheltered.  Living in a great city, they can appreciate what they do have.

Sunday was more of a family day as well as the Super Bowl.  Chinese tradition is to have a big one year old party banquet (200 people).  My sister and her husband go all out with the traditional dragon dancing and the banging of loud drums.  Growing up in San Francisco I used to go to these events all the time and got tired of them.  I look at these events now as a great opportunity to casually expose my children to a part of their heritage so that they appreciate where they are from.  They got a real kick out of it and also enjoyed visiting with all of my cousin’s kids.  San Francisco really is a small city and since both my my mom had 6 siblings and my father had 7, we have many relatives for our children to play with.  There are many advantages and disadvantages of a large family, but today we took advantage of the good parts and the good weather to spend time with family and friends.

While we didn’t get out and do everything this weekend, we did enough and have our eyes on other activities we are looking forward to in the coming weeks.  As usual, we did our normal, “how was your weekend” questioning of our children.  They both looked at each other and yelled, “Great” and told us their favorite parts.  Maybe it is the weather, but I think it is part of the magic of living in San Francisco which gives us energy, strength and resolve to have hope in our lives.

When i look back on this post in a decadeI do need to remind myself that this is a deep recession we are in and many people are losing jobs, worrying about how to pay their bills and simply wondering how to make ends meet.  I don’t think I’m any different.  Like everyone I wonder what might be around the corner and hope to just maintain the status quo, yet to hear my kids say they had a great weekend is just enough to make you feel like you are doing something right.

I have another long week of travel ahead of me, but I look forward to returning back to my city by the bay and recharging my batteries once again.

My Wife and Her Breast Cancer Equal My Inspiration

28 Wednesday Jan 2009

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My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me.
— Winston Churchill
The Santa Monica Boardwalk this evening

The Santa Monica Boardwalk this evening

I have always sought inspiration through true life stories.  I guess I never thought it would come from my life partner.

Those who know me and see me every day will tell you that over the past year I’ve lost over 10 pounds, ran over 1200 miles last year and can run a 5k faster than I did 20+ years ago when I was in highschool and college.  That might seem trivial to those who exercise daily,  but ever since I’ve graduated from high school I never had the drive for long periods of time to work out religiously and take care of myself.  Why now?  How do you find that kind of drive?

Last year when my wife was diagnosed with breast cancer I was down, but my wife told me to make sure I kept running.  The week after she was diagnosed I remember watching Forrest Gump with my children and there is this scene where his love, Jenny tells him,  “If you ever get in trouble, don’t try and be brave.  Just run.”  There is a scene where Forrest doesn’t know what to do and starts running.  I’ve been doing the same, although I ran with purpose.  My wife is my inspiration.

We all get inspired by bigger than life stories.  The pilot who saved 155 people by landing his plane in the Hudson, the new President who is breaking many barriers, the man who risked his life to save an unconscious mom and her two toddlers from a burning home, etc.  Sometimes we see movies like the first one I ever saw called “Brian’s Song” that had cancer involved and get inspired for the moment or for a period of time. 

 But when we live with someone who inspires you on a daily basis it changes you. My wife has to take pills every day, get shots once a month and every day think that there still might be a cancer in her body that might come back to haunt her.  Yet every day, she kisses me, makes breakfast, smiles and goes about her work.  All those pills, shots and everyday worries are not something she shares with me unless I ask.  I don’t ask because I want her to feel like life is as normal as can be as that is the way she wants to live it every once in a while.  She wants to put away that she is a Cancer Survivor.  She doesn’t want to be treated like she’s handicapped.  How can you not be inspired when the person who shares a bed with you every night does so with smile on her face.  She’s had two surgeries and is staring a third in the face, yet she is wanting to bring it on.  She’s had 14 hours of anaesthesia in less than 6 months.  I can’t imagine what it would be like to have those hours missing from my memory.

The other night she caught me staring at her sleeping before I went to bed.  I wanted to soak in her peacefulness, her beauty and my appreciation for her to still be with me and our children.  She asked me if anything was wrong and I just smiled and she gave me that knowing kiss that all wives will give when they know you appreciate them.  It’s the same kiss you get when you stand before all your friends and family the day you get married and state your love for each other.

Today I am off away on business again.  Away from my family.  It hurts to be away knowing my wife is still not 100% yet, but she’d not want it any other way.  Tonight I had a chance to visit the Santa Monica Boardwalk (see photo).  I told my business partner (no offense) that I wished it was my wife with me instead.  She deserved this sunset on this beautiful evening more than I did.

Friendship is the Basis for Great Love

25 Sunday Jan 2009

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There is a true and sincere friendship between you both – Fortune Cookie

The title of this post is one of those “No Duh” titles, but it is so true. When I got the fortune quote above in my fortune cookie, my two children giggled and my daughter said, “You love mommy, she isn’t your friend”. My wife and I smiled and reminded her that we are friends first and partners second. We all say that, but it is true.

People always ask how we met. I was at our son’s basketball game this weekend when I ran into the husband of one of the other wive’s in our class who is suffering from breast cancer. They are more private about their cancer and while he is a physician and more pragmatic about their situation, I could tell he was suffering a bit. He told me that we looked happy and that we seemed to have gotten through everything okay. I told him we were doing better. It hadn’t been easy and we’re still prepared for any setbacks, but we are in this for the long haul. He shook his head and asked how we met.

It is simple to say we met in college, but one for the drama and long stories, I always tell them about how I met her at the old Pittsburgh airport while saying goodbye to a girlfriend with whom I had recently broken ties. My ex was traveling home for the Thanksgiving holiday along with one of my best friends, Joanne, and this cute little brunette with an infectious giggle. I myself was on my way to Cornell to visit my cousin for a monstrous feast as he and his friends in the Hotel Restaurant school at Cornell were cooking.

My ex and I had broken up not because we weren’t right for each other, but more because her parents wanted a nice East Coast boy for her, and not some Asian kid from California. It was my first real taste of racism and I think it hurt my ex to hear her parent’s feelings about this subject more than it reminded me of the reality of our country at the time. It had been two weeks since we decided to call it off and I wanted to make sure she was okay since it would be the first time she’d seen her parents face to face since they gave her the ultimatum. I had tried to make the situation light but she was sick. I don’t remember what I said, but this little brunette teenager laughed at my joke and we smiled and introduced ourselves. Every day I hear my wife’s giggle it reminds me of that Thanksgiving eve.

Ironically my friend Joanne had been debating back in August about whether to introduce me to my future wife or her good friend from high school for a beginning of the year formal. She chose the latter thinking that she’d be better for me. She might have been right at the time and we still do exchange a friendly email from time to time to update each other on our lives. My future wife would hear stories about me from the other two girls and roll her eyes. She did say she was intrigued to be privy to how I treated a girlfriend and was curious to say the least.

That Christamas I got a card from her and when we returned from the holiday break we started studying together and having an occasional meal in the cafeteria. She was pretty studious and (so she said) was not interested in dating. At least she wasn’t interested in dating me. That said, she dated a few guys and I dated a few girls and she’d critique my girlfriends and I’d critique her boyfriends. I remember when I was dating the 6’2″ star of the women’s volleyball team (I am 5’9″) she would tell me how silly we looked and I loked her straight in the eye and told her maybe I should date a short brunette a foot shorter? She smiled and looked away.

We became good friends, best friends. I really had wanted to date her but I had pretty much decided to focus on school as we got closer to graduation and full time recruiting for jobs. I even took some time out from school to work for a law firm just to make sure that Wall St. was more for me than the Court Room. They say absence makes a heart grow fonder and I think that time away made her realize (it took 2 years) that maybe we could be more than just friends and shared that first kiss and first date.

Focused on our careers it still wasn’t until 9 years after that fateful night at the old Pittsburgh airport that we got married. Our friendship enforced by memories, hardship, and our own group of friends and family made our marriage a “no-brainer”. Those nine years of waiting were the foundation for a great friendship. We realized how much we shared in common and how any differences enlightened ourselves to a world we did not know but were willing to learn about. By the time we got married we had already been making decisions that assumed we would be together. It was only natural.

It was love at first sight, but it was a friendship that formed first. People say we are an old married couple as we often finish each other’s sentences, but what makes it work is that we often surprise ourselves and each other when we don’t really know the answer. We are testing our love, not our friendship. I know chances are that someday my wife will have to help me the same way I had to help her with her battle. fate bought us together for a reason.

Getting the Best out of Yourself

22 Thursday Jan 2009

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Try not to become a man of success but a man of value.
Albert Einstein

The quote above to me is so poignant. I truly believe though that it must become second nature to be a man or woman of value and you need to instill that from within.

I still remember the day that I almost lost my dad back in July of 1996. He suffered a heart attack and his heart stopped beating, but the doorman at the Fairmont Hotel broke into his car and started his heart beating. My father remained in a coma for two weeks (yes during the Atlanta Olympic Games) before coming out of it. My father suffered some brain damage (loss of oxygen to the brain) which caused him the loss of short term memory and often caused him to lose orientation of what year it was. It was almost like Alzheimers except some new memories were created and he only forgot the things that didn’t matter to him.

My mother refused to put him in a home and acted as his primary caregiver for the next 10 years. Although he was never the same person again, I am so happy that his near death kick-started me into having a family and grandchildren that he got to meet and know. He continued to to teach me new lessons even then.

One of those was that my dad lost his ability filter his thoughts. He did not hold back his feelings about things, people or situations. Just imagine if you just started telling everyone what you thought of them. Well, my dad was pure. He smiled at people he didn’t recognize and even at people I thought he didn’t care for. Later I would ask who they were and he said, “I thought you knew”. When my mom would drag him to flower shows I’d ask him how it was. He’d say it was really boring but my mom seemed to enjoy it. He never had a bad thing to say. He was just naturally a positive and gentle person. His illness was a truth serum that some couldn’t handle. We saw others with the same problem who became vicious towards family and friends. An old co-worker of his pulled me aside at his Life Celebration and said, “I knew your dad didn’t recognize me, but that twinkle in his eye and his smile were still the same. He made even strangers feel special.”

It really taught me to seek the kindness in others and to see things first with an eye towards the positive. We are often taught to be protective and cautious and I realize that can really hide the opportunities that you might be offered. There are never enough favors that you can give or thank yous that you can say. My dad was definitely a man of value. A man who valued the relationships and loves in his life so much that it was instinctive.

After a while it should just come naturally. I often hear about how people say how hard it must have been to take care of my wife during those days after surgery and those long weeks of waiting. I think my love for my wife made me her natural caregiver. I knew that it was just the thing to do. Put my fears and hopes aside to be all that I could for my wife. I think having been a caregiver for my dad those years, watching my mother care for her husband (yes they argued, but they loved each other), and then caring for my mother during her cancer gave me a little headstart in caregiving, but not much. The most inspiration though came from the relationship, the strong relationship, I have with my wife. They say your true colors come out when you have times of crisis. I think I showed myself my own true colors and I’m proud of what I saw.

I mention this because in the book I read, My Life with Laura, my friend Chad showed his true colors as well. Although he had only known his wife a few short years, his dedication showed the love of a lifetime. I have read stories about those who don’t get support from their husbands or family members during these times and I think that might just show a crack in the armour that had been there already. My wife and I have a few cracks especially when it comes to communication. And it definitely showed a bit when we had some intense moments, but our love was and is strong.

I know I’ve written about this before in bits and pieces, but I have to repeat these mantras occasionally. I listened to our new President’s speech about strength and fortitude and the need to test ourselves in the worst of times. Now is when I really am testing myself. I already see these next several months are going to be tough on me for different reasons than health.

In the end I just need to make sure that I find myself as a person of value and to instill that upon my life on a daily basis.

6 Degrees of Separation – How Far is His Reach?

20 Tuesday Jan 2009

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It is not length of life, but depth of life. — Ralph Waldo Emerson

Today is a historic day in the history of our young country. On this day the temperature reached the low 70s in San Francisco and as I drove to work I saw thousands of people gathering at San Francisco’s Yerba Buena Gardens in front of the MLK Memorial Fountain to watch the live broadcast of the inauguration. As we elect our 44th president, I look on with interest as an unbiased bystander. I told someone recently that I never contribute to political campaigns and often shy away from political conversations in favor of human interest stories.

I’m often touched by the idea of six degrees of separation. To have that with a President is a unique one for sure. I’m not someone who has photos with Presidents or will ever pay to have one. Today on the front page of the San Francisco Chronicle was a story of James Kessler, a student at the high school associated with the school that I went to and the one my children attend. Back in November. James is battling a rare and deadly sarcoma and back in November had a chance to meet then-Senator Obama (see article)
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2008/11/05/BAGO13TUEL.DTL

James is being treated at the UCSF Children’s Cancer clinic, an organization that is supported by my co-owned Ben & Jerry’s franchise located in the Haight-Ashbury District.

One of my other ties is that of Julius Genachowski, the nominated head of the FCC. Julius served on the Board of the parent company I work for, IAC, and always has been a gracious person with a sharp memory. I was recently impressed when we ran into each other in an elevator at our Corporate HQ and I forgot his name briefly and he said, “Hi Erik, how are things going?”

Finally, the closest connection I have with our new President derives from my days as an MBA candidate at the University of Chicago (Booth School of Business). One of the more conservative Business Schools in the country (George Schultz once served as Dean), it sits across Chicago’s famed Midway from the Law School, one of the more liberal law schools in the country. Back in 1993, I decided to take an “easy elective” in Business Law for no grade. On one or two occasions I sat across from a young law teacher in the lounge named Barack Obama (I thought he was a student). I recall casually talking about sports (remember I hate talking politics) but I never knew this guy would 16 years later become our President.

What does this mean? Nothing really. Or maybe it does lead me to believe that I finally have some kind of kinship with our government that I hav faith in it. Both Barack and Julius are young parents like myself. They have lived lives that I feel are somewhat similar to that of my own (albeit more successful). Perhaps they understand my plight. The plight of a young father wanting to take care of his children and unsure of their future safety and financial well-being.

I had a wonderful weekend with my children attending a professional basketball game, attending their own basketball games, playing golf with my son and the birthday parties of some young cousins. It was a great family weekend made even better when my daughter gave me a hug to say she had a fun weekend. It was a great weekend to forget about the economy, our health issues and our state of world affairs as I had planned to do.

Finding Our Way Back

17 Saturday Jan 2009

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A woman is like a teabag. It’s only when she’s in hot water that you realize how strong she is.
Nancy Reagan, former First-Lady of the United States of America

When I took off for my run this evening I sought my usual answers.  Every night that I run I come home to the real answers to my questions.  My legs felt fresh and I couldn’t have started my three day weekend on a stronger note (Martin Luther King Day).  I ran further, faster and felt better than any time in the last 18 months.  I was inspired by wife, my life, my children and my gratefulness for a second chance to cherish what I have in life.

This weekend is going to be great.  Our first real chance to be a family again with my wife able to join us out and about.  Also I won’t be traveling and the weather is going to be beautiful.  Both of our children have basketball games and I get to sit there in the stands with my wife and smile holding hands as we watch our children have fun.  Isn’t that what we all dream of?  No matter the economic recession we are in, the historic times of our government change, and the sickness our family has endured, it’s just a simple weekend where we can all be home to support each other and care for each other that makes it all feel better.

After my first business trip of the year and most extended business trip since my wife was diagnosed, I’ve felt a calm and patience that I haven’t felt in a long time or ever.  I used to think that I was the one who could stop and smell the roses, but these days I am learning not to stop for just two seconds but maybe for an hour and not just smell the roses, but close my eyes and hear the sounds of children laughing and birds chirping.  I know it sounds silly, but you must forgive me.  I don’t think I’ve ever taken my family for granted, but I just can’t help but want the most for them.  Isn’t that what all dads and husbands want for their families?  I know it is what we want from the start, but sometimes we forget when the world starts to surround us and life has that way of throwing surprises which consume us.

My wife has started back on her exercise track.  I think the other women around us of have inspired her by saying how she has inspired them.  My wife doesn’t feel like an inspiration though.  We have become aware of some other mothers around us who are suffering with breast cancer in silence.  We worry about them and feel so lucky that we have found our path.  Looking back our path was simple compared to many other women who have been stricken with this disease.

Maybe it was appropriate tonight I caught one of our guilty pleasure movies on tv, Music and Lyrics. ’80s pop music kind of defined the relationship roots that we have.  This movie was a cute little love story we caught one night and just couldn’t get the simplistic tunes out of our heads for weeks.  For some reason, the main song had a nother meaing to me tonight when I heard it again.  I think we’re definitely finding our way back.

I also want to remind you all that on Monday, Martin Luther King Day, I will be hosting a Q&A with Chad Moutray, author of My Life with Laura – A Love Story.  Chads and his wife lost her battle with breast cancer in 2007 and he wrote a book about his experiences.  I do hope that you will all make sure to come back and read the interview I had with him.

Rio Hotel Las Vegas – Hotel Review

15 Thursday Jan 2009

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View of the Rio from the top of the Palms

View of the Rio from the top of the Palms

Rio All-Suites Hotel ( a Harrah’s Property)

www.riolasvegas.com
3700 W Flamingo Rd
Las Vegas, NV 89103
(702) 777-7634
Cost: $
Hotel Decor:78(feels like an older hotel with sterile and not very tasteful decor.  Floor to ceiling windows was the best asset)
Hotel Amenities: 80 (Like all hotels this one has a casino. All rooms are suites )
Neighborhood Scene: 80  (Not located on the strip but across from the Palms)
Miscellaneous: 80 (Restaurants are not the equal of those on the Strip)
Overall Wow Factor: 77 (Nothing spectacular here.  The hotel is not very glamourous compared to its neighbor, The Palms)
 
I recently stayed at the Rio Hotel in Las Vegas for a convention.  The room rate was $129.  Next door the Gold Coast rate was $29.  The best part about the Rio is that people love the spacious rooms, the floor to ceiling windows and the views of the Strip.  The main performer at he Rio is the longtime Vegas act of Penn and Teller.  The hotel is also the home of the World Series of Poker
Rio Hotel Deluxe Suite

Rio Hotel Deluxe Suite

Obviously if you don’t like gambling or can’t deal with all the smoke, you wouldn’t be in Vegas.  This is definitely a hotel for conventioneers.  The one interesting amenity in the room is a strange looking frame next to the bed that turns out to be a window from the bathroom to the bedroom.  Yes you can actually watch someone in the shower or watch your bedroom from the shower.  It supposed to let light into the bathroom, but it just seemed odd to me.  The hotel’s amenities were not that great.  They charge you another $20 to use their gym.
The Rio is part of the Harrah’s chain so get a Total Rewards card and you will get credit for some of their more upscale properties such as Caesars.  The hotel is only 51 stories high in the Masquerade Tower which has a nightclub and restaurant (VooDoo Steakhouse).  If you are a steak connoisseur I might suggest going somewhere else although the dinner was not that expensive.
For those with kids, once again I suggest that Vegas is not for children.  Reserve a home off the Strip if you are bringing a family
Hotel Room view

Hotel Room view

Mind Over Matter

15 Thursday Jan 2009

Posted by in Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Route 53 - Life is A Highway

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Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.  ~Winston Churchill

As most runners know, there are times when you hit the proverbial “wall”.  I’ve found that it doesn’t matter whether you are running one fast mile or 5 long ones, the wall is always there. Your body aches and screams for you to stop but it is your mind that powers you on.

In a way I have hit that wall in caring for my wife.  That tough edge has been hard to keep up lately.  I’m not giving up on her though.  In fact her strength is coming back and I’ve been able to let my guard down a bit and that has allowed me to move on a little bit.  i think she is showing me that strength again to let me know that I can go on too.  She has now started going on and doing her own research online.  It has relieved me from having to read some of the more tragic or difficult stories online.  I used to go on Breastcancer.org to find answers but lately she has found a few good friends with the same physicians and they have encouraged her, helped her to mentally get stronger to face her fears, and she is spending more time talking to other women online.

She still is fragile though.  I just got back from being away four days in Las Vegas at a convention.  It was very difficult to be away from her and to leave her with no back-up.  Our nightly calls were more about wondering if she was okay.  It was also about telling my 9-year old son to watch out and take care of his mom.  I’m hoping that I don’t scare him, but I see great maturity in him.  I always have see it since he was little baby.  He just had this “old sage soul” look about him.  At the same time he still has the other issues that little boys have, not cleaning up, not lifting the toilet seat, and not slowing down around the house.  All in all he’s a good kid though and I trust him immensely.  My favorite moment (you’ll see the relevance below) is when he was 7 and as an advanced reader had picked up an encyclopedia to look up the word embryo, a word he had heard on Animal Planet.  The next thing you know he is telling me that apes and humans are very simliar and that men have sperm and women have eggs, but they don’t lay them like chickens.  My daughter (5 at the time) stood behind her brother with her arms crossed and looking at me as if to say, “Hey, what’s the big idea?”  well let’s just say I don’t think I’ll ever have to have the bird and the bees talk with my chilldren ever.  Hopefully that is a fatherly chore that I won’t miss.

It has been 5 weeks now since my wife’s latest surgery and I have had a hard time honestly looking at her scars and even at her chest.  Tonight she wanted to start documenting and had me take a few photos of her reconstruction.  I was a little nervous.  It was the first chance for me to take a look.  It is hard for me to look at my beautiful wife with her scars and say that they look great only because I know she is able to sense any hesitation or trepidation in my voice.  It is still early and even she knows they aren’t quite ready to be looked at.  She is going to need to get some revisions as the original scars haven’t healed straight.  She will have a follow up appointment on March 23.  It should be an hour procedure. 

The hard part was that today the doctor called to make the appointment and our 9 year old son listened in on the other line when my wife was talking.  He later told my wife that he had listened.  He is really worried that his mother is going to have a third surgery and asked if she was going to be okay.  Our daughter caught on and told us that she thought we got rid of “mommy’s lump”.  We told them that just like we need to go to the doctor every year that mommy needs to go every month and that she was lucky that her doctors could spend so much time with her.  Listening to her talk to the children I realized she is getting stronger.  She doesn’t want them to worry.  She is even telling me she will just need local anaesthesia for the final surgery.  I would prefer general if it were me but she is game.  She told me she knows she can “handle it” .  I told her that I didn’t think it would be a good idea but she’s the strong one when it comes to blood and guts and told me I was getting soft and where was the guy who stripped her drains 4 months ago?  We had a good chuckle.

All this means to me is that my wife is almost fully back and I couldn’t be happier.  She’s taught me a lot about myself and our relationship over the past several months.  It has been painful and although there are times we wanted to give up, but somehow we’ve built the strength from each other and kept moving and pushed through that wall.  The aches and pains are still there but the goal line or finish line is still out there on the horizon. 

Life goes on and we’re traveling down the road together.  We’re helping each other out and making sure the other doesn’t give up and that we don’t give up on each other.