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Category Archives: Breast Cancer – A Loving Fight

Our battle with breast cancer

Feeling Thankful

28 Thursday Nov 2013

Posted by route53 in Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Route 53 - Life is A Highway, San Francisco - Sports & Life

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breast cancer, cancer, faith, life, spirit, strength, Thanksgiving

“When life kicks you, let it kick you forward” – Anonymous Brest Cancer Survivor

Thanksgiving always kicks me and reminds me about how thankful I am that the 2 most important women in my life survived breast cancer and more importantly inspire me every day.

Breast Cancer Awareness month (October) came and went again for my family last month.  Between my mother and wife it is the 9th consecutive year that it has directly hit me (although indirectly through others as well).  Last month was actually the magical 5 year cancerversary for my wife.  It is a fictional celebration point in the timeline for a breast cancer patient.  The chances are high that you’ve kicked the disease if you haven’t had a relapse.  The journey has been so long, we almost forgot it.  In fact when we went for my wife’s quarterly check with her medication, it didn’t even dawn on us.  Cancer is like part of the family.

Going to visit the Diller Cancer Center is an eye opener and a reminder of our journey.  As we walked through the Infusion Area where most people are getting their chemo, you just get grounded when you see all the drawn and tired faces.  If I have to say one thing, if you ever have the chance to keep a friend or relative company when getting their infusion, please do.  It is the hardest and loneliest part and no matter what they say, having you there is only a plus.  I can only recall a handful husbands or dads ever sitting there with the woman getting her infusion in all the times I’ve been there.  When I talk to other husbands, I always tell them to be there 3 times as much as you ever have been.  You will never have that chance to show your love and how thankful you are for their being a part of your life.  When life gives you hurdles, you just need to jump higher!

After the visit last month, I told my wife that sometimes I feel guilty that we’ve put the cancer behind us.  She admitted she felt guilty for not celebrating the 5 year milestone.  I told her maybe we haven’t forgotten but choose to push forward.  That day we saw Dr. Deb Cohan.  Deb chose to have the same surgery as my wife.  They both are daughters of 2-time breast cancer survivors and thus were very pragmatic about their situations.

The video above is of Deb holding a little flash mob before her surgery at the Center. Ironically for me it is the first time I’d seen the exact surgery room where my wife had her surgery. What spirit.  We all fight through our fears and challenges in different ways.  Deb got some flack for her celebration, but I think she chose to show her spirit externally to let people know what kind of fight she needed to put up.  It is a great reminder to me of the fight and spirit my mother and wife have shown and continue to show me and my children every day.

Life is a battle no matter how you look at it.  Approach it with zest and spirit even when facing your biggest fears.

Friday Afternoons with Mom

17 Sunday Mar 2013

Posted by route53 in Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Route 53 - Life is A Highway, San Francisco - Leaving your heart

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aging, birthday, Burma, cancer, grandmothers, life, survivor, travel

IMG_1011[1]

Last Friday I was driving home early from a downtown meeting when I decided to take a slight detour to visit my mom.  It was her birthday after all and I had yet to wish her a Happy Birthday.  There was a risk though.  She might not be home.  My mother is not your ordinary mid-70s grandmother widow who sits at home in front of the television knitting sweaters for her grandchildren or even baking cookies for her neighbors.  Catching my mother at home is like finding a gambler in his room in Vegas.

I was lucky. And she let me know it.  I caught her on her iPad (I don’t even own one) checking out movie times and booking dinner reservations.  “I’m going to dinner with Pat and Ford, then we’re going to see Oz, the Great Wizard, and then play cards.  Want to come along?”  Oh no I couldn’t burden my mother and drag down all her fun!  The idea of dropping in on my “elderly mother” so she wouldn’t be lonely was preposterous.  I was the lonely one looking for the comfort of knowing that she is perfectly fine.

“Thanks for the birthday wishes.  What are you doing here?” she asked.  I guess it was not obvious.  My mom is so hip she would rather get a Facebook birthday post on her wall.  She wouldn’t want me to waste paper or spend money on stamps.

We finally settled down as she showed me some of her new projects and she handed me some old papers that belonged to my dad.  She became a little somber at the thought of my dad who has been gone for over 7 years now. “I miss James”, she said unprompted.  I do too, but somehow I feel she’s moved on a little better than me and my siblings.  My dad was the ultimate provider.  I remember him visiting his 90-year-old mother in Chinatown after leaving his dental office downtown every day.  He’d check in with her and she’d give him some strange Chinese medicine or dish to give to his family. A mother of 8 children who basically raised them herself in a small 1-bedroom apartment, she still looked after her own despite her son trying to take care of her.  My dad married a similar woman.

My mom, after her brief, moment of reflection pulled out a map.  “So when am I taking you guys to China?”  My mom wants to introduce my wife and kids to their (kids, not wife) Asian ancestry.  There is no other one better to do this.  My parents used to leave us kids home and venture off to China where my dad would lead tours for a month at a time and come back with the very first Walkman ( you remember the one that you clipped to your belt and pull down your pants because it was so heavy?).  I would have loved to have traveled with my grandfather to China, so giving my children the opportunity to do this with their only living Asian grandparent would be a real treat.  Then she said continued, “Don’t worry your dad and I will pay.” Darn, there she goes trying to take care of me again when I am supposed to take care of her.  Of course she had to bring in my departed dad into the picture.  Yes, the great provider is still taking care of us from the heavens and she invoked his spirit knowing I would protest otherwise.

I told her we’d discuss money later, but she continued, “Your dad left me a nice pension, it’s okay, he worked 6 days a week for you kids, not for me. I’ll go to Disney with your sister and her family.  Stop worrying about me.”

Worry?  This is a 70-year-old lady world traveler who readily tells people her zodiac sign before she tells you her name.  She’s a 10 year survivor of breast cancer, a widow, a grandmother of four, a sister to seven brothers, and avid sports fan.  She then hands me a slip of paper. It is a list of chores (pick up the paper and water the flowers) “Don’t forget my itinerary.  I leave for Burma on Friday.”

“What?”  Okay, how many have people have a mom like my mom at her age saying that she is off to Burma?

“Remember Shelley?  I’m going with her mom.  She lost her husband last year and wants to go.  It will be good for her.  Did you know that Burma is one of the last countries to adopt the internet?  In fact the Chairman of Google is going there as well to help explain to them.”  There goes my mother telling me more about the internet than I already know.  Needless to day, she will be the person I call when I have wireless router issues in my own home.

I remind her that Burma is a 3rd World country despite all the pictures of the great food that she will be eating.  She shoves photo after photo in front of me as I tell her to watch herself.  She’s not listening.  I tell her that she doesn’t need her iPhone, but she tells me how she is going to load up the new Justin Timberlake album so she can listen to it on her trip.  Suddenly I am 10 years old again and I’m getting a lecture from my father.  Only this time it is my mom.  She has taken over his role.  She is the great provider.

“Erik, you have to stop worrying about me.  I’ve survived cancer.  I have a second chance.  I’m not going to die without taking care of those around me.  I have a second chance to give everyone my attention.  I’m paying for your trip because I don’t want you and your wife to worry about the money. You have wonderful kids. You can’t be so thrifty that you don’t give your kids a great experience.  I’m helping your uncle because he needs my help (her 60-year-old younger brother needs support and my mother checks on him weekly and gives him a small weekly allowance).  Your dad (there she goes again invoking the spirit of the great provider) and I wanted you to have more than we had and now we want to help you give your kids more than you had.”

Damn, my mother is so right.  I laugh at her strength.  Her willpower and zest for life is amazing.  She is the patron saint of positive attitude.  Sometimes I think she is so naive.  I think she thinks her eldest son is too jaded.  She knows I’m going to worry about her on her trip, but reads my mind, “Don’t worry, will you stop? The worst thing that will happen to your mother on this trip is that I will burn my mouth on all those spicy foods.”

She gives me a big hug and we go on to talk about me, my kids, my family, her family, my friends, her friends, and what seems like her expected travel itinerary for the next decade.  Maybe she should join Dennis Rodman on his next trip to North Korea.  Two hours go by and I’m now late for dinner with my family, but I suddenly feel like my dad and his mother as she gives me a bag full of cookies and teas, and other assorted refrigerated products to bring home, “I don’t want these to be sitting around while I’m gone.”

The next evening we go out to dinner to celebrate her birthday and my daughter’s birthday.  Like the way she will suddenly disappear and travel to the other side of the world, my brother-in-law notices she is trying to pay for her own birthday dinner.  She is frustrated when her intercepts and stops her.  When she gets back to the table, she’s not happy.  I smile at her and she tells me that we are all like our father.  I smile back and tell her that she is like him too.  The great provider.

2013 – The Year of Faith, Dreams & Desire

31 Thursday Jan 2013

Posted by route53 in Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Route 53 - Celebrity Sightings, Route 53 - Life is A Highway, San Francisco - Sports & Life

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cancer, desire, dreaming, Inspiration, motivation

Rudy“You must take action to reach the thing you desire” – Rudy Ruettiger

Okay its 2013 and I had better make my first blog entry before the first month is over.  As usual the year has begun with a furious pace.  Annually I attend the Affiliate Summit, a marketing convention primarily for online entrepreneurs.  More importantly the 4 day venture to Las Vegas is filled with pats on the back for a job well done and celebrating with friends.  For me I use it to catch up but to start executing the plan for the coming year.  I also use it to find inspiration.  Inspiration for work and for life.  The convention has had a great track record for me when it comes to inspiration and motivation.  Last year there was Eric Thomas, the hip hop preacher who found inspiration and desire to motivate others to stand up and make a difference.  This year it was Rudy Ruettiger, the real life story of a nobody with a dream, a lot of heart, and a strong belief in himself.  These Rocky-esque stories remind me of my own dreams, my own desires, and my own passions.  Don’t give up on them, don’t forget them, and finally don’t forget to act on them when you have the chance.  Although I had seen the movie version of Rudy’s story many times, I was still moved.  Some might think it cornball, but he is where he is and we were paying to listen to him.  Afterwards I told Rudy thanks for reminding us all to dream.  He grabbed my hand and said, “ Dream BIG, but more importantly dreams can’t come true if you don’t do something to make them happen”.

SONY DSCWell it has been a couple weeks and my promise to keep writing has been nagging at me.  I have all this content and haven’t made the time and effort to start putting the fingers to the keypad.  Part of it is my work which has been so overwhelming that 5 hours of sleep each night almost seems like too much.  Things have to change and I will need to set some time aside, find personal inspiration, and make it work.

So here I am on a plane from Seattle to San Francisco with a crying baby screaming in my ear over my ipod as I am writing my first entry of the year.  Why now?  Why not work on a work plan that I need for work?  Well as I sat in the airport with my colleague at the airport for a dinner, I found myself seated to another inspirational figure in my life, Dave Dravecky.  Here is a guy who had a great gift, a God-given gift, and then it was taken away from him by cancer.  My son never saw the left-handed pitcher of the San Francisco pitch before he lost his arm, but I’ve told him the story of that day I watched Dave’s arm snap as he threw his last pitch ever.  My son is a left-handed pitcher in San Francisco’s little league and despite having about 50 bobbleheads on his shelf, the one that sits right there on his desk is Dave Dravecky’s.  As he cradled his iphone in his right hand talking to his grandchild his wife glanced over at me and I we started talking and I told her how I thought she was married to a great man.  Today Dave is employed by the San Francisco Giants marketing team and was in Seattle to help give the Hutch Award from the Hutchinson Cancer Research Center to Barry Zito for his year where he “exemplified fighting spirit and competitive desire”.

dave_cardThe Giants organization is a leader in online sports and community marketing and their work with Dave and the community is such a great example of people who have gone beyond their excellence on the field and used it as a platform for making the world a better place.  Dave got off the phone and reached over to shake my hand and talked to my colleague.  I told Dave how much he has touched people and in different ways.  When my wife was recovering from Breast Cancer, I told her Dave’s story.  Dave has never used his loss of his arm as an excuse.  He has never sounded bitter in public about the bump in the road life gave him.  He has said it is an opportunity and a message to everyone to have faith.

Dave was also a past winner of the Hutch Award.

Dreams. Faith. Action.  And this is how my story begins in 2013.

P.S. 80 minutes into this flight and the kid is still screaming up a storm.

Cancerversary, Orange Hair, Best Round Ever and Opening Week

09 Sunday Sep 2012

Posted by route53 in Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Route 53 - Life is A Highway, San Francisco - Sports & Life

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cancer, Giants, golf, survivor

9/9/2012

I can choose to let it define me, confine me, refine me, outshine me, or I can choose to move on and leave it behind me. – Suzanne Summers, Cancer Survivor

 

                       

Cancer Survivor Race For a Cure

One of the biggest questions in life is not about whether you should put the past behind you, but WHEN you should put your past behind you.  We sometimes hold on to things too long and miss the opportunity to enjoy new things for fear of not showing support or thoughts for those events and people that have marked your life forever.

 

Today was just one of those sobering days. The fact that it is two days before the 11th anniversary of 9/11 as well as the 13th birthday of our son only made it slightly more complicated for my family. Most importantly for us, 9/9 marked the four year anniversary of my wife’s battle with cancer. Cancerversary is a name given to the day of your surgery to remove cancer from your body. While five years is the true date to really start to believe you are in remission, we have truly chosen to move on from cancer in our life. We dwelled on the battle for the last few years, but once my wife started being removed from a few drugs this year we felt like moving on and getting on with our lives would be the best.

 

Ironically, just a few weeks ago we ran into my wife’s oncologist at my cousin’s wedding (my cousin works for her). I realized that even she (the oncologist) tries to stay away from the personal side of cancer when she’s out of the clinic. It was the first time our children met her and I noticed how she just tried to keep her distance. I’m sure she’s seen so many happy stories go bad that the pain can get personal and interfere with her ability to stay even-keeled.  Well I just don’t think we can ever run from cancer. It is all around us. Coincidentally for my wife, the Komen Race for the Cure run fell on this day. My wife and daughter ran. It is such a sisterhood. As each survivor runs across the finish line, you notice the applause is so heartwarming for people you don’t even know.

 

Seeing my wife after the race, her face was glowing. I think we realized that we can’t walk away from cancer. We can move on, but it will always be a part of our lives. Unbeknownst to my wife, my daughter, son and I had a nice little chat about how special the day is and how lucky we are that their mother is still with us. We talked about not making it a big deal, but I could see how special that day was for my kids.  Later on my daughter pulled me aside and said that she was glad to be running alongside her mom.  I’m sure my wife was just as happy for the same reason.

 

For me, I played on the par 3 course I grew up on. I’ve played it 100s of times in my life and finally broke a milestone score!

 

My son and I also celebrated Orange weekend….watching the Giants stretch their lead over the rival Dodgers.

 

And finally we watched my daughter and her team launch their soccer season with a fierce 3-0 shutout.

Golden Gate Park Golf

Beat LA!

Yes, life moves on.

The Breast Cancer Video I Never had to Post

02 Wednesday May 2012

Posted by route53 in Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Route 53 - Life is A Highway

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Breast, cancer, dying, living legacy, mom, parenting

Tonight I came across this video below.  Support the National Breast Cancer Coalition.  This video is so sad.

It brings me back to my dark days 4 years ago thinking about what I was going to have to tell my children about their mother and worrying about what I’d have to do if I should become ill before my own children  became adults.  I am fortunate that my wife’s diagnosis was not as bad, but once you belong to the community of breast cancer survivors and caregivers, you are part of the community forever.

Amazingly, Genentech saw this video and are allowing her to get a drug that is on trial,  She won’t be cured, but the drug should prolong her life.

Inspire to be Inspired – Breast Cancer stories

26 Monday Sep 2011

Posted by route53 in Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Route 53 - Life is A Highway, San Francisco - Leaving your heart

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breast cancer, cancer, charity, Inspiration, komen, komensf, race for the cure, san Francisco, survivors

This morning my family participated in the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure for breast cancer.  I have to admit that having dedicated my runs to breast cancer research over the last 3 years, I wasn’t necessarily excited about running with my family as part of the team put together by the schoolthat our kids attend.  I like running alone with my thoughts, but this run is for a good cause and breast cancer runs are an event that I encourage everyone to experience.

Each year I forget what a scene it is.  Survivors of breast cancer are given special shirts that help them stand out.    As my kids and I picked up our regular shirts we saw my wife go to the “Survivors” tent to pick up her shirt.  The hug she was given by the volunteer and the clapping that people gave her hit me.  It reminded me how serious this all is and how lucky we are.  Everywhere, teams lined up for their group photo.  That is where you saw the numbers.  We counted 5 in the Bank of America group, 6 in the Oracle group, 3 in our school’s group.  Another 4 in the Pottery Barn group.  The numbers were there.  1 in 8 people there had survived cancer.

My son and I ran the 5K race leaving my wife and another mom survivor after she told us to run ahead.  As we ran past a survivor or one passed us the cheering got loud.  We completed the race and waited at the finish line for my wife.  It is such a rare race.  People wait by the finish line more than any other race and cheer each other on.  Most runners leave, but no at this race.  As you see that special pink shirt that says “Survivor”, you see their fist pump, the tears and the smiles on their face and you cheer and clap until your hands hurt.  And then for me I see my wife running across the line holding my daughters ahdna and her friend’s hand up high and smiling.  My son put his arm around my waist.  We let everyone else cheer.  It made me proud and inspired as a participant. Sounds weird, but that’s how I felt.  In a way, I felt bad that I had almost not wanted to participate for my own selfish reasons.

Pink Balloon arch by the Ferry building start line

Yes I was inspired by my wife as well as the hundreds of other survivors who crossed the finish line today.  But more importantly I was inspired by the outpouring of community that I saw as people encouraged complete strangers and urged them on.  One lady said , “This race is nothing.  I kicked cancer’s butt” as  local reporter approached her as she crossed the finish line.  The power of encouragement drove them.  My wife said the outpouring of encouragement every step of the way wouldn’t let her stop.

Probably the best part of the Komen Race For the Cure is the celebration at the end where survivors walk one by one through arches of pink flowers  and are serenaded with a round of applause from all participants.   As each individual survivor emerges, the roar is amazing and you can almost see their stories.  There were women in their 80s.  There was a young teenage girl.  There were women of all ethnicities.  As woman after woman emerges, there is the build up of emotion and you wonder if it will ever end.
Then everyone breaks out and sings “I will Survive” by Gloria Gaynor (?).  To me the song is wrong.  I think they should be playing Eye of the Tiger BY Survivor.  These women are not survivors.  They are tough fighters.  Just like Rocky.  They inspire us to run and never ever give up because we know where we came from.

3 Years Later – Still Standing

09 Friday Sep 2011

Posted by route53 in Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Route 53 - Life is A Highway

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breast cancer, mastectomy, remission, skin-sparing, surgery, survivor, therapy

“Don’t you know I’m still standing better than I ever did.  Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid”  – Elton John

It has been three years since my wife’s cancer surgery.  We haven’t even talked about it being an anniversary of that day.  I know she has been begging her oncologist to be removed from some of the test medications she has been taking.  Maybe 3 years has been enough.  Well today is a milestone.  Probably a milestone my wife would rather forget than celebrate, yet one to set as a marker along the side of the road of life.  I for one still remember that day like it was yesterday.  Reading that blog entry again seems so surreal.

3 years.  Since then it has been:

  • 3 more surgeries.
  • Taking 4 huge  pills daily. Although she can tell you, I don’t know if I can tell you what they are for.  One is to fight the reoccurrence of cancer, another is for the side  effects and another is to balance out the side effects is all I know.
  • Additionally there is that monthly shot that leaves her belly black and blue for a week
  • Then there is the 3 times a week physical therapy.  That knife thing scares me.  It is supposed to smooth out the skin and prevent the build up of scar tissue, but it is just ridiculous,
  • There is the monthly counseling with the oncologist and staff, and
  • There is the monthly meeting to go over the test results of her medications.

Despite being a daily voluntary lab rat the last several years to help studies for future victims of cancer, my wife has really embraced life more than ever and it has changed her.  Her strength and her courage are beyond what I ever imagined she had in her.  Those changes in her life mentioned above might be considered inconveniences to many of us, but she takes it all in stride to the point where she forgets to tell me that she had an appointment until the day is over and to say that the oncologist told her to say hi to me.

They say that you aren’t truly in remission until you pass the five year mark, but my wife is already a Survivor.  More than that, she is a Winner.

Finding Inspiration

05 Saturday Mar 2011

Posted by route53 in Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight

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Inspiration, parenting

Mountains are the means, the man is the end.  The goal is not to reach the tops of the mountains, but to improve the man.

– Walter Bonatti, Italian mounaineer

I’m one of those people who is always taken by inspirational movies, especially if they are true.  They really help me dream and look for solutions in life.  Having been in the online retail business though, I am not tainted by the fact that I know many movies take their liberties  with the truth, whether they are “The Blind Side” or “Rudy” or “61”.  Like most, I am one of those people who usually tells you to read the book first.  The books are always better, right?  Movies always leave out the details and don’t capture the true emotion.  Not the emotion of the writer, but the emotion you feel from interpreting the words as your eyes meet them.

In this modern day where social media allows us access to more of these stories, I find myself these days inspired by the stories of two fellow alums of Carnegie Mellon.  I was lucky enough as an undergraduate to have met Randy Pausch when he was a graduate student at Carnegie Mellon and shared a carpool over Thanksgiving from Pittsburgh to Baltimore.  His well documented You Tube video, called the Last Lecture: Achieving Your Childhood Dreams became a hit and inspired many who faced death with a sense of calm, respect and fortitude to keep on teaching and giving back.  He also gave inspiration to living life to the fullest.  In fact there was no need for a movie as the video captured the leacture and was all that was needed.

More recently, I picked up the book, 127 Hours: Between A Rock and A Hard Place.  It is actually a little hard to imagine this scenario if you’ve never been there.  I saw the original documentary many years ago on Dateline with Tom Brokaw which I recommend you all watch before seeing the movie or reading the book.  It will help you with the perspective.  I’ve inserted Part 1 here.

The amazing parts are the actual video re-count that he captures where he makes comments and last testaments in expectation that he will not be able to live to tell us family and friends that he loves them. 

I’m about one third of the way through the book and I thought I’d review the Dateline interview again this morning.  I’m always looking to inspire my son who at age 11 still is learning to dream and think big.  For the first time I saw him riveted and inspired not by the crazy outrageous voyage that led the main character to his predicament, but by his will to succeed, to remain calm and cool under extreme pressure and to show a strong will to find one’s passion. 

I’m ready to go out today and succeed.  In the book, Aron Ralston talks about his richness in life that he appreciates.  I intend to go out there and do that today and look forward to finding tomorrow’s inspiration

The Graston Technique – Breast Cancer Rehabilitation

06 Thursday Jan 2011

Posted by route53 in Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight

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breast cancer, graston technique, massage, scar tissue

Graston Instruments

We often think about the recovery from breast cancer and most often hear about surgery, chemotherapy and radiation.  My wife is now 2 years past her surgery.  It is easy to look at the rehabilitation and the treatment as trivial but it is a battle.  The scars still exist and are a reminder of the trying time we went through.  The piles of pills and the monthly shots will continue.  The pills will continue for another 3 years and the black and blue bruising elephant shot will go for one more year.

Part of the surgical process most breast cancer victims have involves the use of alloderm which helps regenerate tissue in the recovery process.  The result is an intact acellular matrix of natural biological components that promotes rapid revascularization, white cell migration and cell repopulation.  The problem with most women is that this results in what is known as rippling caused by the scar tissue.  Many women are taught to massage their breasts after the surgery, but this has met with mixed results.  Recently the Graston Technique has been introduced.  It uses medieval looking tools which vibrate against the skin as it runs over the rippling area. 

Please see the attached story and video:

http://abclocal.go.com/kgo/story?section=news/health&id=7879903

The story features both my wife’s therapist, Julie Wong, and my wife’s cancer surgeon Dr. Shelley Hwang.

Thanksgiving – Remembering to be Thankful

26 Friday Nov 2010

Posted by route53 in Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, San Francisco - Leaving your heart

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cancer, Jill Costello, lung cancer, san Francisco, Sports Illustrated, Thankful, Thanksgiving

“When you’re down on your luck, you gotta do it,” –
Andrew W.K.’s feel-good song Got to Do It
 
After my wife found she had cancer a couple years ago, Thanksgiving took a different meaning for me.  I felt guilty that it took her illness for me to appreciate the holiday for what it is, but I do now take the time to remind myself and my kids about how thankful we should be at this time of year for what we have rather than next month when people start wishing for what they don’t have.  Tonight I sat on my brother’s couch after dinner, half napping as the tryptophan kicked in.  Fighting the lure of a nap, I picked up the recent Sports Illustrated and started to read an article about Jill Costello, a local girl from San Francisco with a big heart who graduated from the University of California at Berkeley this past Spring and as the coxswain for the women’s rowing team, led them to second place in the National Championships.

Jill Costello - former Cal rowing star

I had read briefly about Jill back in May in the local newspaper after I heard about her through the UCSF Medical Cancer newsletter that my wife gets. Jill had been diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer although she did not smoke.

Although I hadn’t kept up with her story, as I read through the article I felt myself tearing up.  I knew what was coming.  I looked over at my wife smiling and laughing with my family and felt truly blessed.

Thanksgiving is truly THE family holiday of the year.  It isn’t long enough for most people to travel far  away.  It isn’t about presents or religion.  It is about celebrating your place and those around you and being thankful  for what you have.  Sometimes hearing stories about the loss of others who really are special people reminds me of this.

I want to give a special thanks to my friend Donald Wilhelm who we lost this year.  A good guy who inspired many and left us too soon.  In the article in Sports Illustrated: The Courage of Jill Costello, we read a great story about another inspiring person who can teach us to appreciate what we have today.  Although the article did not mention it, Jill lost her battle after graduation, but her strength inspired many to give more than you receive.

As her coach so succinctly put it at Jill’s funeral, “There are givers and there are takers, and you want to be more giver than taker. She never complained. She gave far more than she ever took. She was an inspiration to all of us. I hope when we face something as daunting as this, we can show some of the courage that she showed.”

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  • The latest The People Route53 Follows Daily! paper.li/Route53?share_… Thanks to @NJdoc #ai #machinelearning 1 day ago
  • The latest The People Route53 Follows Daily! paper.li/Route53?share_… Thanks to @GlenWoodfin @CensureTalks #ai #machinelearning 2 days ago
  • The latest The People Route53 Follows Daily! paper.li/Route53?share_… Thanks to @JohnLegere @jeffreytumlin @sfchronicle #ai #machinelearning 3 days ago
  • The latest The People Route53 Follows Daily! paper.li/Route53?share_… Thanks to @NJdoc @SFnatives @JoelHenard #ai #machinelearning 4 days ago

Affiliate Marketing

  • Affiliate Karma
  • Affiliate Marketers Give Back
  • Affiliate Summit
  • Socialnomics

Cancer Resource Links

  • A Guide For Clueless Guys
  • A Supremely Kind Spouse
  • Alltop Breast Cancer
  • Breast Cancer for Husbands
  • Breast Cancer Husband
  • Breastcancer.org
  • Carol Franc Buck Breast Care Center
  • FightPink.org
  • Love Her Tender
  • Men Against Breast Cancer
  • My Wife With Cancer
  • Price of Love
  • The Moutray Chronicles
  • The Widow Lady

Personal Links

  • Jeremy Affeldt's Where is the Love
  • Love Bug Fans
  • My Personal Facebook Page
  • My Personal LinkedIn Profile
  • My Twitter
  • Route 53 on Video
  • San Francisco Giants
  • WordPress.com
  • WordPress.org

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